2003-10-14 - 4:10 p.m.

I found the old place today, but it's a new place.

Remember that old message board I used to go to with all the angry people who were trying to out shrug each other? I fell onto their new message board today almost completely by accident.

I said almost.

The new one is much more aptly named and has all the same old people, I only stayed for a half a second, wasn't sure I was where I was, but there it was, looking like before but with a new name.

I don't understand the point of a new name when they link in the head anger monger's diary.

From the look of things nothing has changed. I wonder how people can continue like that, never growing or connecting on any level other than boiling under anger. Just people getting together to...wow, I spent tons of time there and I can't say what they got together to do.

I'll say this though, now that I'm thinking about that old crowd, I miss Tel, I wish I had a way to contact him and just let him know that I understand now what he had been trying to say and why I made it hard for him.

As I was going through dealing with the depression thing, I thought of it, how I was relating my less than good moods and tough times (the whole Nick thing) to what he was going through and being aggrivated with him not giving me more, but now that I've been playing in the real depression leagues I can see how different it was for him, and how impossible it was for him to give me what I had been looking for.

I still have his work number, but I couldn't bear to call him at work for this. I wish I could just send him an email or something, but all of that is gone.

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