I fell asleep on the sofa (surely the CO was to blame) and woke up when REPAIR MAN arrived, disappointingly in blue workpants and shirt. No lightening bolt or tights to be seen.

He was a good old irish boy, handsome and redheaded. He was in my price range...er...age range and we headed down to the basement together.

He looked at the furnace and laughed.

LAUGHED.

Can't do a thing with this, too old, look, it's rotted on the bottom and OH MY GOD is this the RETURN?

(uh, return?)

This is illeagal.

Oh no, tut tut, tsk tsk. You need a whole new furnace, new duct work, new blower, perhaps a heart transplant and hair plugs. Oh my, call extreme makeover STAT.

He looks at what our buddy Norm had written and snorts. He blows out our pilot light and announces that we're lucky that it's warmer weather now. (The weather man just said it's only going down to 28 tonight, lucky us).

He climbs over the barriers we have set to separate him from the drooling beast and proceeds to SIT ON THE FLOOR and allow the drooling beast to sit on his lap while he discusses a new system with "nana".

This is my big protector dog. Sitting happily in the lap of a guy who wants us to give him $4400.00.

Some day I have to remember to teach that dog to attack.

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