Have we talked about timing before? Have I done this? I feel like I've done this, an entry about timing.

Doesn't matter, we're going to do it again. I'm not sure where it's going so we're just gonna pick up a stick and wander along beside this stream of consciousness okay? Walk with me.

Some people have perfect timing. Some people know exactly when you need them and they show up and they are just what you need and it's perfect.

Some people know that perfect timing means not just knowing when to show up but when to fade away and disappear.

The best gift someone ever gave me was disappearing when I'd miss him the least. It was part of his magic. My life completely was ruled by this person, I was in high school, you know how in high school, well at least for me, things were so dramatic...I know, let's all pause and sit on this rock by this stream and think about what it might be like, OOMM being dramatic.

Sarcastic lot you people.

Anyway. I was in high school and my life revolved around him and he needed to move on, move away, he was NOT in high school (did you expect him to be my age? then we haven't met). He waited. He did what was not right for him but right for me. He waited a full year. We were not dating, I'm not even sure you could say we were friends, but we were...connected none the less and he waited for my childish fancy to light on someone else before he quietly left without saying goodbye.

Yeah. We're not here to talk about him. We were just saying that there's people who have good timing...watch out, there's a mud puddle there...

And then there are people with crap timing.

I wonder if it's genetic? I know these brothers. I love both of them. In very different but similar ways and I could not begin to explain that sentence to you. Anyway, they both have timing that sucks the hair off donkey testicles.

One of the brothers, the elder, I've come to accept that our timing will never be right, we've each chosen what we've chosen and that's that.

The problem comes with the younger brother. I've known him forever and last spring we...got to know each other even better. It started as a drunken evening, it continued as a diversion from the weirdness going on in our real lives, a little fantasy that we knew was coming to a swift end.

Events large and small conspired to end our little time together emphatically and while I think of him from time to time, and very fondly, I didn't expect there to ever be much in the way of a revisit to that time, or for that time to influence our future freindship.

The other day he called me, or I called him, I don't even remember now, but at any rate, I didn't expect the reaction I got from him.

It's sweet, but confusing on many levels. It's alot to think about. There's alot of other forces pulling at us both, but when he starts saying the stuff he says...it's easy to remember and it's easy to believe his words.

But he's definately got the family timing.

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