A conversation had while driving to work this morning:

OOMM: "...hate all cookies of...FUCKING TURN ALREADY IT'S NOT THAT HARD...all types now because I don't ever want to frost..."

D: "Say that again?"

OOMM: "I'm saying I hate frosting cookies."

D: "No, the part where you yelled about the turning."

OOMM: "Oh, this guy was making a turn in front of me and deliberately taking an hour to do it because he can see that I'm in a terrific hurry and knows that I hate him."

D: "I don't care why you said it, just say it again."

OOMM: "what the fuck are you talking about?"

D: "Say what you said to him."

OOMM: "I don't even remember what I said to him. What is with you this morning."

D: "You said, I'M TELLING YOU NOW IF YOU THROW THAT OUT THE WINDOW WE ARE NOT GOING BACK FOR IT THIS TIME, you said..."

OOMM: "I didn't say that."

D: "He's got his hand out the window with his truck in it."

OOMM: "Close the window."

D: "We're losing the thread of this conversation. What were we talking about?"

OOMM: "my hatred of frosting."

D: "I can help with that. No, oh, I know, you were yelling at the guy in front of you."

OOMM: "Why are you obsessing on this."

D: "You said 'turn already, it's not that hard',"

OOMM: "Okay. Wow, I'm fascinating when you repeat it back to me like this."

D: "Say it."

OOMM: "Seriously, what are you smoking?"

D: "Forget it, it's passed."

OOMM: "I don't get it, 'turn already, it's not that hard.'"

D: "one more time."

OOMM: Is there a specific part of this that we're excited about?"

D: "Just..."

OOMM: "Fine" (repeats)

D: "Can you call my voice mail and say that over and over?"

OOMM:"I'm getting you a straight jacket for Christmas."

D: "No one in california says Haaaad, everyone says hard. Jesus that's hot."

OOMM: "And a rubber room."

I won't continue, it degenerated from there, but seriously, I'm gonna start charging him for these calls.

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