2006-09-22 - 4:43 a.m.

Anybody who tried to comment to yesterday's entry- I appologize, apparently the comments aren't working for that particular entry though they seem to be working still for previous ones. I've sent an email to d'land about it.

If I could find the camera (though I suspect I know where it's run off to) I'd take a picture of Ketos in his bachelor pad. He was in good spirits last night so my hopes are high.

Instead of a picture of Ketos then let's have this:

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Yummy!

It's been a good week for tasty boys.

Tuesday night was also Standoff which I said in yesterday's entry that I'm having a tough time falling in love with. This weeks episode was the best one yet in my mind. The thing that's surprising me is that I started watching because, Hello, Ron Livingston:

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When I first noticed him way back when I kept saying what everyone says, that he'd be really cute if he'd just fix that eyebrow thing. Now I don't even notice it. I just think he's dreamy.

However I don't know if it's just me (I kind of doubt it) but I think the breakout star of this show is turning out to be:

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Michael Cudlitz. I really wanted a cap of him walking into the room with the little girl (whom he saved by throwing his body over hers in the tub when a bomb was detonated-um, by the way, I'll be in the tub around 11pm tonight Michael and I have very shifty neighbors, you might want to drop by and hurl yourself on me just in case) but that was the one cap that the worldsgreatestcapper DJCapslock didn't grab. Anyway. The point remains, MC= surprise creamy center to the chocolatey outside goodness that is Ron Livingston.

Also in this weeks parade of hotness is the fact that America's Next Top Model Cycle 7 started last night.

How this show has lasted 7 cycles is I suppose a testiment to how much we all enjoy making fun of people. It's like the gong show only these people have no idea that we're laughing at them.

You would think though that by Cycle 7 they would lose the whole "I'm just a small town girl...blah blah blah...infinity" crap. We get it, there are always hayseed chicks who've never been on a paved road, we don't care.

Also? If you aren't willing to leave your kids/boyfriend/husband and shut up about it guess what, you haven't been drafted into this, you don't have to come. Just stay home.

You can also stay home if you are morally opposed to, well, sort of anything because fashion is all about being morally reprehensible.

And a tip for the Cycle 8 ladies. The likelyhood of Tyra and company ordering you to have your hair chopped off is in direct proportion to your love of your long hair. My advice to you, if you adore long hair is to cut your hair short before you come to the competition and let Tyra pay for extensions.

Can we talk about the tears and screaming every time Tyra rolls (heh) into a room? The screaming I almost understand because clearly your ability to pretend to be excited about Tyra has much to do with your longevity on the show, however, the tears, none of these girls are good enough actresses to be crying on cue so I have to believe that the tears are for real. Are you crying because you're afraid she'll steal your cookies? Cause that's probably going to happen.

It's interesting to wait for the girl each year who will come in to that initial evaluation with Tyra and her backup J's and contradict herself. Last year it was...oh I've blocked her name from my memory. The one who was afraid of the cockroaches...you remember.
This year it was Anchal (whose name I'm stealing) who when asked if she was wearing blue contact lenses for her shoot said that she was because in India light skinned and eyed women are considered to be more beautiful and she's hoping to fight that stereotype.

Huh?

So you're going to be as ugly as you can while wearing light colored contacts? Cause otherwise you're not making much sense.

Oh, right.

Moving on...Anchal, and A.J. both told us how ugly they thought they were which is of course the exact reason most people decide to become models. Oh, I'm a fugly troll, what profession should I choose?

Megg, who I sort of like told us that she's different and unique. When asked what made her so she answered that she listened to "deep" music like heavy metal and rock and roll. Oh dear.

When one girl (I don't remember which) said that she deserved to win because she's had a difficult life (I had no idea that modeling contracts were handed out based on life difficulty, but then I've never gone to a job interview with a collage about my life on a posterboard either...there are so many things I learn from this show) Tyra told her that she would be picked apart in the modeling industry and that it might be too difficult for her emotionally. Her answer?

I want to go as far as my mind takes me.

Your MIND? Did you miss the door for MENSA and end up at ANTM? Either way I don't really think you're gonna come out on top.

I'd love it if Tyra would come over to my house and explain to me why we need to know about people's mom's dying in plane crashes in order to know if they can sit in front of a camera and look pissed off. No, wait, I have puff pastry at home...don't come over Tyra, just send me an email.

I love little Brooke. There's no way she can win and in her portfolio shot she's not connecting with the camera at all but I still love her. She looks like what would happen if my friend Katie and Reese Witherspoon had a baby.

AJ does some excellent shots and I love Megan.

This Monique girl has terrible pictures, she can't even figure out how to throw a cell phone. She fades into the background of her very first portfolio shoot but do you know what? She's gonna stick around for a long time because she brings the drama and she's a black girl. Don't bother sending me mail, I said it and I meant it.

Melrose brings the drama too but she'll be out on her ass within the next 3 weeks. White girl drama = unhappy Tyra.

Melrose by the way looks way too old on film. I hated her pictures too and think she needs to go, make no mistake.

The twins? Amanda can't walk. She's the twin who WANTS to model, Michelle is the twin who came for the ride. Michelle's pictures are brilliant. She connects with the camera in such a fantastic way and was quite good on the catwalk but her sister has to go home.

The "Fierce" count for episode one is 5. Though I think they knew they were a parody of themselves that time.

None of it matters though because the hotness continued with the bringing back of my baby:

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I should mention that he's got a new makeup line that's on QVC at 6pm tonight and if anyone loved me they'd tape him hawking it so I could drool on him later but I'm not holding my breath.

Tonight is the new CSI. Can you hear me yawning from where you are?

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